What is an example of defensive communication? The defensive behaviors include evaluation, control, strategy, neutrality, superiority, and certainty. For example, communication perceived as evaluative will increase defensiveness in the listener, due to the perception that the communicator is judging the listener.
What is an example of defensive behavior in communication?
The defensive behaviors include evaluation, control, strategy, neutrality, superiority, and certainty. For example, communication perceived as evaluative will increase defensiveness in the listener, due to the perception that the communicator is judging the listener. Click to see full answer. Similarly, what are some examples of defensive behavior?
What is defensive communication in a relationship?
Defensive communication in relationships can be damaging and can lead to increased arguments, uncertainty, and stress. Defensive communication can occur in family environments and can consist of verbal and nonverbal behaviors that are threatening and/or punishing to others.
What is an example of defensive listening?
One example of defensive listening is to hear a general statement and to personalize it. When a friend says, “I’m not a big fan of people who are fake,” a defensive listener may infer that the friend is indirectly calling the defensive listener fake.
What are the criticisms of defensive communication?
A central criticism of defensive communication is the lack of empirical research supporting Gibb’s initial paper on the topic. Gibb’s paper on the climate conceptualization of defensiveness was not a scientific study and did not allow other researchers to replicate or test his hypothesis.
What are some examples of defensive communication?
What is verbal defensiveness?
What is defensive response?
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What are some examples of defensive behavior?
Defensive behaviors are a group of evolved responses to threat. They include flight, freezing, defensive threat, defensive attack, and risk assessment. The type of defensive behavior elicited in a particular situation depends on features of both the threat and the situation.
What are the types of defensive communication?
The defensive behaviors include evaluation, control, strategy, neutrality, superiority, and certainty. The supportive behaviors, in contrast, include description, problem orientation, spontaneity, empathy, equality, and provisionalism.
What is defensive listening example?
Defensive Listening– taking innocent comments as personal attacks (listeners misinterpret or project feelings of insecurity, jealousy, and guilt, or lack of confidence in the other person).
Which is an example of a defensive statement?
“If you keep reacting like you do when I try to get something across to you, we're never going to get anywhere.” “You're just trying to avoid blame for what you know you did. You always do that.” “I'm not going to keep talking to me if you won't listen and just have to tell me that I'm wrong.”Aug 31, 2020
What is being defensive in communication?
Defensive communication happens when a message triggers a sense of threat, and therefore defensiveness, on the part of the listener. Defensive communication involves not only the actual verbal message, but also body language, tone of voice and perceived meaning and intention as well.Oct 13, 2017
What is defensive talking?
Generally, when people talk about someone becoming defensive in the context of a conversation, they are meaning that that someone is engaging in emotionally defensive maneuvers designed to ward off their having to experience some unwanted feeling or admit responsibility for some disowned act.
What causes defensive listening?
It happens when a person tries to find fault from simple and innocent comments or statements from a person and perceive it as a personal attack, an indirect criticism and even a trigger to pick a fight which then causes the receiver to become upset and defensive as well.Oct 25, 2019
What is relational listening?
A relational listening style means that when we listen to a message we tend to. focus on what it tells us about our conversational partners and their feelings. 2. An analytic listening style means that we listen to gather information and. tend to think carefully about what we hear.
How can I listen without defensiveness?
Self-soothe to listenWrite down what your partner says and any defensiveness you're feeling. Dr. ... Be mindful of love and respect. ... Slow down and breathe. ... Hold on to yourself. ... Don't take your partner's complaint personally. ... Ask for a reframe. ... Push the pause button.
What is defensive and supportive communication?
Defensive behaviors are carried out when a person feels threatened during communication and hence the need to defend him or herself. Supportive communication is important as humans interact, as people need to feel a connection with other people.
What is a defensive behavior?
1. aggressive or submissive behavior in response to real or imagined threats of harm. A cat, for example, may exhibit defensive aggression by spitting and hissing, arching its back, and raising the hair along the back of the neck in anticipation of a physical threat (see animal defensive behavior).
What is being defensive?
To be defensive is to react with an overprotective mentality so a situation that perhaps doesn't warrant it. Defensiveness is an impulsive and reactive mode of responding to a situation or conversation. Rather than listening with an open heart, we respond with our metaphorical shields up and weapons drawn.Feb 24, 2020
What is an example of defensive communication? | Study.com
What is Defensive Communication?: Defensive communication is a type of verbal or nonverbal communication triggered when an individual feels threatened, anxious, or somehow inadequate.
6 Ways To Communicate Without Being Defensive - Bustle
Being in an argument or receiving criticism from another person truly sucks. But instead of going straight into attack mode, there are ways to help you stop being defensive while learning how to ...
Why is defensive communication important?
Defensive communication is only necessary to help us identify patterns of communication that are unhealthy. In the end, avoiding defensiveness is just a good practice toward improving communication. Go to Interpersonal Communication Articles. Go to Home Page.
What is the first step in defensive communication?
The very first step in defensive communication is to preserve your peace of mind. You cannot let an attack get to you, even if it’s direct, even if it’s real, even if it’s in front of others, even if...
What is the third step in a verbal attack?
The third and last step is to address the verbal attack in an objective way until the attacker also calms down. If the attacker has been calm all along, it’s likely you're dealing with a workplace bully, in which case the situation calls for more drastic corrective measures.
How to deal with a bully in the workplace?
Many of the same principles of defensive communication apply when dealing with workplace bullies: Remain calm, observe and listen, then react with professionalism and objectivity. If the verbal abuse continues, escalate the problem to HR or the bully’s manager.
How to deal with verbal aggression?
Engaging in Defensive Communication. Whether the verbal aggression is direct or indirect, you need to deal with it before it becomes the predominant dynamic in a work relationship: before you become a punching bag, so to speak. The very first step in defensive communication is to preserve your peace of mind. You cannot let an attack get ...
What does it mean when someone is defensive?
If several people get defensive with you, it's likely you're attacking them, directly or in a hidden way. You may want to practice a direct and yet caring way of asserting your needs. If the defensiveness shows up only with one or two individuals, then it may be their problem to solve, not yours.
How to recognize a veiled verbal attack?
Another way to recognize a veiled verbal attack is to observe your own reactions. If you have a negative gut reaction to something that it's said, look for the hidden message and distinguish if the speaker is attacking, or you're being oversensitive.
How does defensive communication work?
Defensive communication happens when a message triggers a sense of threat, and therefore defensiveness, on the part of the listener. Defensive communication involves not only the actual verbal message, but also body language, tone of voice and perceived meaning and intention as well. As a person becomes more defensive, he or she becomes less and less able to perceive accurately the message and the motives of the speaker. On the other hand, supportive, non-threatening communication reduces the likelihood of distorted perceptions on the part of the listener. It results in greater likelihood of the listener actually hearing the message, and being able to fully understand and evaluate it.
Why do we rely on defense mechanisms?
At certain times, we all rely on defense mechanisms to get us through difficult circumstances. These automatic, mental reactions keep us from fully feeling painful or threatening emotions. Defensive communication is one of the most prevalent, and unfortunately destructive, types of defense mechanism that addicted individuals may use.
What does it mean when a listener feels that your communication has underlying motives for your benefit?
Messages that appear to have ulterior motives: If a listener feels that your communication has underlying motives for your benefit, he or she will feel that the communication is manipulative and therefore not worth paying attention to. (Ex: Let’s skip cocktails and order dinner right away.)
What does it mean when a message conveys a sense of superiority?
Messages that convey a sense of superiority by the speaker: If a listener is made to feel inferior or inadequate by any part of a message, he or she will reject the entire content of the message. ( I know more about how this, so let me give you some tips.)
How to communicate with a coworker?
Pay attention to your delivery. Avoid sending “condescending” verbal or nonverbal messages in the way you speak and deliver your communication. Strive for calm, neutral language that conveys your message in a respectful manner. It is helpful to imagine that you are speaking to a coworker or boss, where you must manage your own emotions and place emphasis on delivering the content of your message without offending the person you are talking to, no matter how you may feel about them.
How to start a conversation with a friend?
Start the conversation in a non-defensive way. Avoid blaming, making character assassinations, or condescending generalizations. Instead, focus on observations – what you see or hear.
What are challenge words?
Words like “however”, “but”, “although” or “instead” can elicit defensiveness and shutdown collaborative communications before your message has been processed.
What is defensive communication?
Defensive communication is a communicative behavior that occurs within relationships, work environments, and social groups when an individual reacts in a defensive manner in response to a self-perceived flaw or a threat from outsiders.
What are the four contextual conditions for defensive communication?
Romantic relationships create four contextual conditions for defensive communication: self-perceptions of flaws, situational difficulties, emotional difficulties, and relational concerns. Research shows that people are sensitive not only about their own perceived flaws, but also about the flaws of those close to them.
Why is communication perceived as evaluative?
For example, communication perceived as evaluative will increase defensiveness in the listener, due to the perception that the communicator is judging the listener. Descriptive communication, such as requests for information that are perceived to be genuine, does not initiate the same defensive response.
What are defensive and supportive behaviors?
The defensive behaviors include evaluation, control, strategy, neutrality, superiority, and certainty. The supportive behaviors, in contrast, include description, problem orientation, spontaneity, empathy, equality, and provisionalism. Individuals respond either defensively or in a supportive manner based on their own perceptions of the communicative climates. For example, communication perceived as evaluative will increase defensiveness in the listener, due to the perception that the communicator is judging the listener. Descriptive communication, such as requests for information that are perceived to be genuine, does not initiate the same defensive response.
Who was the first scientist to study defensive communication?
Sigmund Freud was one of the first scientists to research the subject of defensive communication in depth, during his development of psychodynamic theory. Defensiveness creates inefficient and damaging communication in social interactions when people deny their flaws, project their flaws on others, or use judgmental communication techniques.
What did Freud believe about the defensive climate?
Freud and his colleagues believed that internal emotions such as anxiety, guilt, and insecurities created defensive reactionary behaviors. Psychodynamic theorists also believe defensiveness is a reactionary response to protect oneself from external threats. Defensive Climate Conceptualization.
How to avoid defensive listening?
A person speaking with a defensive listener might have to censor themselves much more than they should to prevent any negative reactions. It is not always possible to avoid these kinds of reactions, as it can be hard to avoid the trigger completely. However, attempting to avoid defensive listening can cause a whole other kind of communication issue, in that not everything that needs to be said is getting said.
How to get defensive when someone is listening?
If you are having a conversation with someone listening defensively, it is easy to get defensive yourself . For example, if he or she reacts defensively to an innocent comment, you might feel the need to defend yourself or tell them that they are defensive. Doing so will only set off further feelings of defensiveness.
Why is defensive listening bad?
Defensive listening can be very harmful in relationships, as an individual may believe that they are being criticized or attacked, which can cause misunderstanding and arguments.
How does defensive listening affect relationships?
By exploring the effects that defensive listening might have on relationships, you are better equipped with the knowledge and reasons necessary to put a stop to it. In many cases, leaving behind defensive listening makes the relationship much stronger and better at communication. Make a real effort to get rid of your defensive listening habit, and you might be surprised at the improvement in your relationships.
What is discriminative listening?
Discriminative listening is the most basic type of listening. It focuses on discerning between different sounds. We can use discriminative listening to assess changes in an individual’s tone, indicating a shift in their emotions. For example, we may notice a normally cheerful coworker is feeling down due to their altered tone of voice.
How to slow down when listening defensively?
When you're listening defensively, how do you slow down enough to see the statement from another point of view? Firstly, you have to identify that you are defensive. From there, it is best to stop and breathe. Breathing often makes you calm enough to listen. If you are unable to relax, taking a break is key to revisiting the issue later. Seeking clarity is important for both parties - what triggered the defensiveness? What did your partner truly mean by that statement? Once this part of understanding has been reached, you might find common ground. Doing so will have the individual self-soothing and leaning less on their partner to fix the issue on their own.
Why is it important to leave behind defensive listening?
In many cases, leaving behind defensive listening makes the relationship much stronger and better at communication. Make a real effort to get rid of your defensive listening habit, and you might be surprised at the improvement in your relationships.
Why is defensiveness the ultimate conversation killer?
Conversations get stopped, communication gets blocked and, in the long run, relationships slowly erode. That’s because defensiveness is THE ultimate conversation killer. Defensiveness and open communication are like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde — anytime one of them is around, the other one seems to completely vanish.
How to be less defensive?
Everyone experiences defensiveness differently in their body, but the key is that we all experience it! By getting more familiar with how it comes up in your body, you can take action to become less defensive and keep the lines of communication open.
What happens when defensiveness rears its head?
By extinguishing defensiveness when it rears its head, you’ll fight less, your conversations will be more productive, your life will be more peaceful, and you’ll share way more understanding between you and others.
What to do when a conversation gets heated?
If the conversation is getting heated and you’re not sure what to do - take a break! Call a timeout and go for a walk. Come back and try having the conversation again. Avoid saying things you might regret!
What happens if you don't listen to your conversation?
The result? Instead of understanding and listening, there is guilt, shame and fear of punishment. This is a sure-fire way to bring defensiveness into a conversation.
Why do defensive listeners struggle with sarcasm?
Defensive listeners tend to struggle with sarcastic humor as well, because they may assume that the speaker is putting them down in spite of the humor. While this is sometimes the case with sarcasm, it isn't always true.
Why do people react badly when listening defensively?
A person with strong anxieties and insecurities is more likely to react badly when listening defensively. A spouse may say, "I've got a few other things to do, and then I'll get to that," in response to a request to complete a task. A defensive listener may view the delay as a lack of caring or interest in helping.
What are some examples of defensive communication?
What is an example of defensive communication? The defensive behaviors include evaluation, control, strategy, neutrality, superiority, and certainty. For example, communication perceived as evaluative will increase defensiveness in the listener, due to the perception that the communicator is judging the listener. Click to see full answer.
What is verbal defensiveness?
Verbal defensiveness can be demonstrated by: attacking back, denying, explaining, raising voice tone, interrupting, dominating, repeating, swearing, arguing, rationalizing, and justifying.
What is defensive response?
Also, what is a defensive response? defensive response. Management's admission of some errors and taking of only legally required steps to solve social and environmental problems caused by a firm's activities. It is one of the four ways in which an organization may choose to respond.
Overview
History
Psychodynamic Theory
Psychodynamics is the study of the psychological forces that underlie human behavior. Sigmund Freud's work on psychodynamic theory was the foundation of research into defensive communication. Freud and his colleagues believed that internal emotions such as anxiety, guilt, and insecurities created defensiv…
Defensiveness in social interaction
Defensive communication in social interaction is hypothesized to be related to a self-perceived flaw, attacks from others, or a focus on an attack on flaws of others. In this hypothesis, which combines insights from psychodynamics and Gibb’s defensive climate conceptualization, defensive reactions can be triggered by either internal and external forces. Internally, perceptions of sensitive internal flaws such as personality traits can trigger defensive responses. Externally, …
Applications
Defensiveness in the Workplace
Defensive communication is common in the workplace due to the environment frequently being perceived as evaluative, judgmental, manipulative, or autocratic. Research indicates defensive reactions in the workplace cause inefficiency in communication and potential burnout. Much of the communication in a workplace is between managers and subordinates, increasing the need …
Critique
A central criticism of defensive communication is the lack of empirical research supporting Gibb’s initial paper on the topic. Gibb’s paper on the climate conceptualization of defensiveness was not a scientific study and did not allow other researchers to replicate or test his hypothesis.